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redditI use my limited understanding of Science to figure out the realistic implications of cards. Part 9: Frozen Peak


Soul Crusher
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Clash Royale is a cartoony, unrealistic fast-paced battle game where criminals who go zoom do battle against a man stuck in a rolling barrel. It's not realistic in the slightest, and I aim to remedy that. I'm no scientist, but I'm armed with Bill Nye, Wikipedia, and a Google search which confirms that nobody's done something like this before. All that said, let's get started.

Before we start, a wild boar averages about 150 centimetres in length at adulthood. The Hog Rider has a length of about 2 tiles in game, meaning each tile is 75 centimetres in length and width.

Ice Spirit: It's literally a snowball. It can't walk. With the assumption that it can, the impact of an icy snowball of that size going at 24.3 kph is likely going to cause significant damage, hypothermia, and possible bone breakage.

Giant Snowball: It moves at the laughably slow pace of 50.75 kph, which is about the speed of a car in the suburbs, but much slower than the speed of a ballistic projectile. If it does manage to hit anything, though, the victim is dead.

Ice Golem: The Ice Golem shouldn't be able to move. He should also crumble when attacked or when attacking, due to the weak nature of snowmen.

Elixir Collector: There don't seem to be any good matches for Elixir in the real world due to the relative lack of pink chemicals. However, its use in being made into troops probably means it's some kind of semi-solid metal casting with pink dye. It's unclear as to why it has to be pink, and how creatures made of casting can function with sentience.

Freeze: Freeze is complicated. It stops midair units, but they still flap their wings, perhaps as weak justification for staying in the air. Freezing the King Tower merely stops the cannon: The King is literally still able to look around. The Freeze is using the power of saying "no" to stop the enemies. It has no power whatsoever to actually freeze things. The King just puts on some special effects and asks politely for the enemy troops to stop moving for a few seconds. Actually, that's a bit disappointing. What if we took this another direction? Let's assume that the Freeze does, in fact, freeze all troops in its radius completely. This inflicts absolute zero on the unfortunate victims within the spell's radius. Within milliseconds of deployment, you have stopped the vital functions of several enemy troops permanently. Good job. Next, there's a principle of physics known as "entropy". The way entropy is applied in a situation such as this one is as follows: The area inside the Freeze Spell's radius is at absolute zero, or -273.15 degrees Celsius. No heat energy whatsoever exists inside this area. Entropy dictates that the temperature of an area must eventually reach a uniform state. To reach a state of entropy, the area near the Freeze spell radiates heat into the spell's radius to attempt to warm the things inside back up to about room temperature. But there's an important clause in the Freeze's functioning. The Freeze spell does not stop until the 4 seconds are up. The Freeze will keep the temperature inside it at absolute zero by force, regardless of physics and common sense. The heat energy entering the Freeze's domain is destroyed, violating the law of conservation of energy. The law of conservation of energy states that energy cannot be created or destroyed. The Freeze destroys energy at a mass scale. Within seconds, convection creates air currents which suck more and more matter into the Freeze. As the Freeze eliminates the heat of all the air coming in, the spell's radius expands several times in the span of well under a second. In still under a second, the entire kingdom and the lands surrounding are stuck in absolute zero, the atoms at a standstill. The amount of air being sucked into the spell increases exponentially as the amount of the planet's surface area covered by the spell grows. Before the timer is even up, everything on Earth is completely still. The atmosphere is frozen. The Earth is covered in a massive layer of oxygen ice. The Sun eventually warms things back up, but the effects of the spell can never be reversed. You destroyed the Earth and killed everyone on it. Congratulations.

Bowler: He only has the one rock. Fortunately for the Bowler, that's all he needs. A single bowl obliterates its target and several more behind it. Despite the slow speed of the stone, the victim will notice that they have stained the grass quite badly with their intestines.

Lumberjack: It's implied that the Lumberjack is getting drunk before entering battle. The alcohol impairs his decision making, causing him to make terrible plays, stumble into buildings, fall into the river, and miss attacks. The fact that the bottle spills for 6.7 metres in radius means that the bottle is also heavily pressurized.

Ice Wizard: There's a trend, it seems, of cards being extremely deadly when science is applied. The Ice Wizard is no slouch in this department. His 35% slow does, in fact, affect your vital functions and interrupts your blood circulation. The targets of the Ice Wizard die of a very unusual cause which probably isn't documented. Fortunately for the targets, the Ice Wizard seems to simply be throwing ice shards, which, at most, cause broken teeth if hitting the right spot.

Couldn't make 2 posts today as usual because it's late here and I was writing about the Clash Royale apocalypse. I'm not 100% sure about some of the events explained in the Freeze section, so correct me if you are able. I'd be thankful if someone can (accurately) point out flaws here.

submitted by /u/Town_of_Tacos
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